I am generally quite a tolerant person when it comes to the problem of third world foreign talents. Or I should say foreign "Talents" in this case. Because the word is apparently debatale. Whether the talent is real and substantial or not, it's another matter in entirety. And if I ever do make ah tiong and ah neh comments, I mutter it under my breath. I am generally okay with them being around, as long as they the little dragon girls don't come and seduce my dad, they don't squeeze past me with some potent BO in MPSH during exams that combine with people from other facutlties, don't blow bad breath in my face, and don't speak in their native language and interrupt me during movie/lesson, and don't speak like a know-it-all just because they earned some peanut little scholarship to come to singapore to study. See...I'm okay with them. But some frigging little pea-brained ass hole had to piss me off. And yes, they belong to one of the aforementioned.

Did I mention, please do not come here and act like a major know-it-all when you cannot even speak english properly, not to mention mark me down for it?

A while ago, I received my project grade for a certain science elective that I am taking this sem. My group got a C+. I was a little shock at when I went online to check it, because I thought out presentation was pretty good, with the only screw up being that the video couldn't play during the presentation. But I didn't really take it to heart because after all, I S/U the module.

When my group met again today to sit for the final paper, I was informed by this other group member, who went to collect the comments that the TA had dispensed for the grading of the project, that made me fume.

In case anyone doesn't know, TA stands for teaching assistance. Not lecturers, not qualified teachers, just facilitators. Now, I must say that I had my fair share of superb TAs from ARTS in the past few semesters that I've been in NUS. They are receptive, facilitative, dynamic, not to mention smart, and eloquent. Potential lecturer material in the making...you can see. I've also had a couple, from a certain nationality, who can't speak english all that well, but at least they try to play fair. But these TAs from SCIENCE, fucking cannot even understand english properly, and they were grading my presentation. Do they have the right to mark me down because my english was beyond their comprehension? In the first place, were they qualified to MARK???

Now you see where did my lashing out on these "telents" didn't come from no where.

I was angry not because they gave us a C, because if I deserved that grade, then I deserve it. But no, I got a C because according to my friends, the comment went along the line of:

a) Implied that we did not visit the zoo. Reason because this particular TA so smugly asked us during the Q&A session of our presentation when did we visit the zoo.
Us: We can't remember the date, but it was in Late Jabuary, early Feb. Just before CNY.
Viet: REALLY? Because you know what, the sea lion enclosure is closed for renovations now. You sure you went to the zoo?
Me: Umm yea, So what are you trying to say? It's April now. We went in February. It wasn't close in February.
Viet: (Obviously didn't understand english) wrote something done on his paper, shook his head, muttered something to another TA, and smiled smugly to himself.

Errr excuse me Viet, our group member actually claimed the entrance ticket to the zoo, hello....do you understand that in Feb, Sea Lion enclosure is NOT close yet. Now close not equal to febraury close. Got ticket to claim = got go to zoo.
KNNBCCB! He still had the cheek to write down and implied we did not go to zoo.

Please la...if you can't even understand simple english, please go home to your kampung and rot in one corner. But don't grade me down because you are lousy and don't understand me when the rest of the class did.

b)Okay fine, I admit that my group used a set of word that is a wee little bit cheem. "Polygamous" and "Polygynous". The 2 damn zai sociology majors in my group attempted to explain them when they asked about the distinction between these 2. But they didn't understand. The distinction is not so important, but the meanings it imparts. We explained, but that lousy kennasai bunch of TAs who cannot speak nor understand english properly simply didn't understand. The difference is too colossal for square-brain to process. So they got stuck in the rut deciphering the difference.
And when they couldn't, they gave us a lousy grade and ask us "why must we use 2 different word to confuse them?"

WTF?? You get confused and so that is a fucking good reason to mark me down? I didn't invent the usage of the word on sea lions myself. Some ang mo professor who wrote a book on sea lions did. Go and mark the ang mo down la. GO!! GO call the publisher and slam the ang mo la. Say the ang mo cannot speak english properly...tell him you wanna boycott his book because he has 2 terms that you don't understand.

c) This is getting even better. This woman, who obviously doens't know what a fucking presentation is ask us to refer back to slide number X, and said, "YOu mentioned blah blah blah blah blah, how come it's not on the slide?"

Me: Erm, it's an elaboration of the point I was making.
The Unpresentable TA: Huh? But why is it not on the screen?
Me: Because it's a presentation. You only put the mainpoint on the screen and elaborate the rest. I can't possibly read off the screen
The Unpresentable TA: But it's not on the screen, I can't see

By now, I was visibly pissed by all their stupidity. Though she can't see, but she remembers it, so basically my elaboration on that point struck a chord. It means it got through, it served the point of an elaboration. Therefore it's a good elaboration, because she remembers it. And if the other TAs don't remember it, then it only shows that nobody in SCIENCE listens. They only read text books.

If you want everything on the screen, I might as well just write out a whole damn essay and use Microsoft powerpoint to flash it. I will use my standard Size 12 Times New Roman, complete with double space to write a whole full length 1500 word essay on the analysis and observations of sea lion behaviour in the zoo, and slowly scroll though the full 8 pages worth of elaborations, arguments, ideas and observations.

8 full pages of elaborations for her to see. Right smack there on the screen. Want that right? Jeez, these people have no concept of what a presentation is...

D) Then our video could not play. Somehow suay suay, it just couldn't work on the teacher's computer. I dunno why. But they wanted a video, we took good videos, just that it didn't work despite multiple runs and rehearsals at home.
So some stupid TA insisted again that we didn't go to the Zoo. Fuck la...if they really want, they can always verfiy with the module coordinator that we had receipt that said we went to the zoo one so and so date, and if they had wanted, the video cam that my group mate brought had a time and date as well.
In fact, I had the whole outing on my blog.
So there goes the whole thing about us not going to the zoo again.

Can these stoopid third world migrants just stop thinking that they are so smart. They should just go and see their own comments. See if they make any sense anot. Pity, the cohort is sooo big that the lecturers probably didn't bother going through anything. Not to mention the fact that most of us were arts students and this was an easy-peasy module, a no brainer, that no science academics would wanna waste their time on.

It didn't help that the other 2 girls in my group were drop dead gorgeous and hot. Something these TAs would never achieve, not in a million years.

You get what I'm implying?

Like I mentioned above, I dont really care if they gave me a C+ for my project. It's not the first time I am awarded with a C for anything. But they jolly well shouldn't give me some fucked up reason as to why the project warrants a C. I don't think it's fair for us to pay for their dumb ass mistakes.

The tale of a Push up Bra convert

Victoria Secrets make me miserable. Es was having a spree for VS clearance stuff. I went to check, and the smallest is too large for me. Can those ang mos make more things that are not so big? It's depressing can?

I need new bras. New Push up bras. I never thought that they worked, but after a fitting that day, I found a whole new me that I;ve never seen before. And after that time, I just found out that I've been wearing the wrong size all this while. And I just realized bras are meant to be worn TIGHT. Not move-able, not roomey, not comfortable. But TIGHT. I went for this fitting and this lady dresser who was fitting me up told me that they're supposed to be worn with only 1-2 finger space allowance btween the fabric and your skin. To make the push up possible for any bras, you need the 2 straps to support and HOLD it up. If not it's not push up. U can have bags of silicon or sponge or cushion watever, and it still wont be up. It will just become heavy and sag and you still won't get that lovely cleavage that all VS models proudly bare. If you want strapless, you get a corset.

Now it finally dawned upon me, why a certain member of the 3D, would wear that ridiculous transparent-plasticky strap whenever she wears a spaghetti strap. Because without it, she cannot tell people that she's a D anymore. She'll just be like me. And if I ever tell anyone I'm a D, the person will definitely die laughing.

That's why I need a lift. I want VS...Please VS semi-annual sale faster come. And when it comes, please have my size. I'm skinny k. Not small, just skinny, It's different. Hurhurhur

1 paper down. 4 more to go, yet I feel like I've finished having exams. I think among all my peers, I'm the laziest, slackest, and most nonsensical. During exam, I'm doing nonsense things like spree, bargaining with people to slash prices, blogging, checking my email 10 times a day and whatnot. Everything but study, even though I mentioned previously I WAS going to study. Hard.

Tomorrow's some dumb ass cosmetics and perfume module that I hardly know whats going on. I S/Ued it, so I just need to get a C for it. You know, one should not waste an S/U and get a B- or anything above. Hence I am slacking now. There's also the Animal Behaviour module on Saturday, but my group was so chin chai that we got a pretty sucky grade. So getting C is actually not gonna be a major feat for that.

I am fervently anticipating the arrival of Thursday.

On a totally unrelated note, my parents think I'm anorexic.

After a week of not seeing me, since I stay in hostel and only go home during the weekends, my parents claimed to be shocked that I've been reduced to skin and bones. Right. And I was just about to complain to ZY that I think I've put on a lil' weight from not excercising for almost 2 years. haha.

Okie I fell sick and Zy fell sick on Monday. He had to be given IV drips and I puked my stomach out and fainted. We had to eat watery porridge the rest of the day and the next day. But my appetite is fine. In fact, I think i still eat more than ZY.

But somehow my parents, when they saw me, seem to think that I've been staying in a refuge camp.

Dear mom and Dad,
I'm really fine. I might still be recovering from the bout of sickness. When you saw me, i was wearing a loose spaghetti strap that makes me somehow look alot skinnier than I really am. And my hair was messy from the frustration that I was making slow progress in my readings (not to mention I haven't washed my hair in 2 days tee hee!). And no, exam time means no modelling for me, so it's not to look nice in pictures or to secure that fashion show. So don't worry about me, and I'll be looking as I always did after my exam in 2 weeks time!

I just find it incredulous that they didn't realize I was having eating disorder in secondary school when I suddenly lose ALOT of weight and looked like I was about to faint all the time. I guess that was because they saw me everyday. But now, I don't look like I'm going to faint la. I just look a bit disheveled.

So now, I'm going to eat my harkow, lotus leaf rice, big bao, yong tau foo, chicken feet, soup and I dunno what else there is, so that when my mummy calls me yet again, in 5 minutes, I'll sound like I'm munching something and she'll think: OKie my daughter's not anorexic.

Silly billy mummy daddy...

I guess it could potentially be considered disrespectful. And I don't like to start on the 'he said it first' debate as well because it'll just be childish. Because I made those remarks, I should take responsibility airing a little the reasons for the comparisons. This is not a defence, but rather an explanation somewhat.

When we look at it, we're comparing the similarities in traits which the teachers and friends have identified in cho. comparing what he did ala adding to msn and the massacre of 32 students (33 includes himself) is like apples and oranges. as mentioned, we're comparing traits, adding to msn = part of stalking. we're not comparing the act of what he ultimately did. our dear friend hasn't done any big thing... yet. For the sake of clarification one can realise that the below post did mention that a group of girls have found the traits similar and what's shocking... the word is SHOCKING... to them was that they all linked it to the same guy that's been the subject of much unwanted discussion on the 3-4 posts on this blog. as one can see, the girls he had terrorized were genuinely worried that cho might be what our dear friend will become and they might be on his hit list. Perhaps the language used wasn't of the best in expressing their fear. i'm sorry if the language i used for identifying the traits was taken to mock the VA incident. It really wasn't the intention.

By identifying such traits in him, we are in fact identifying a possible threat to our school and preventive measures may be taken if enough people speak up against him. If you've read the news reports as well, you'd have realized that they did mention that chos are everywhere. Meaning people with such traits are in every school and level of society. He's not so much fighting a religious war but rather sees himself as being the only one going fighting for things he believes in. It need not be religious beliefs, it could just be beliefs.

Although nothing can be gained out of identifying him as a potential threat on a blog, the blogging of comparisons simply serves to wordify my shock as to the similarities between the two individuals. We're worried about the end product of what he may become really. Such things don't just happen in the states where there are guns. Remember the lecturer in Engine Fac a few years back? Not too long ago right? It happened right in our very school.

We can't ignore a potential threat but similarly we also shouldn't ignore the victims of VA and downplay the tragicness of the event in a petty squabble. As mentioned, not everyone knows all the details of whatever transpired but just to assure everyone, it was never our intention to downplay the events and make light of the whole incident. On my part I apologize if the victims or their families take offence in my identification of the similar traits of their killer and our dear friend for the purposes of identifying a potential threat to people around us.

Perhaps we typed too soon and didn't think too much that others would see it as disrespectful. To be honest, my first reaction when reading about his character traits in the newspapers was: OMG THAT'S SO HIM! yup. Really. To be frank i didn't really think OH WAIT I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO THINK THAT WAY. I was more of thinking... THAT BETTER NOT HAPPEN HERE... Such is the flaw of our brains, picking out a part here, downplaying a part there, putting bits and pieces together... Sigh. Still, I'll reserve my right to say 'I told you so' if he actually acts out like cho. Of course by then it'll be too late.

This post is long due, largely because after the photoshoot that on Saturday, I was simply too busy with my spree and preparing for exam. He sent me only a handful of pictures from the photoshoot, many of which are the "in between" real takes. But I thought they were nice enough to just share with my friends, although I probably can't use them in my portfolio. Only the first two pictures are the real deal. The rest were for sport.





This luxurious fur-coat if I didnt remember wrongly, was from Issey Miyaki. Bloody hot inside even though the air-con in the studio was blasting.






Sunglasses from Chanel, Vest from Addidas, Denim skirt from Miss Sixty. TMD, one stupid denim skirt also need to get from Miss Sixty. I could easily get them from Bugis Street Market for $15.

Photographer: Berthold Tenkel

I don't like my nose. I think I need plastic surgery...just some rhinoplasty. i don't need a full plastic face. I just dont like my nose.

The photographer hails from German, introduced to me by Es. It was a really fun/interesting session that day, because the concepts that he actually used on me were different from the other photogrpahers whom I've worked with, and also largely because his apartment/studio is way cool. And so are the clothes that I got to wear for the photoshoot. They were the real deal. Dammit why must I be so haolian...he didn't even give them to me. Anyway, I think it cost him less to hire me than to get those Chanel and Gucci sunglasses.
.
.
That thought is so depressing...me being worth less than a piece of plastic.
.
.
.
Dammit, photographer from NYC emailed me today, and I told her I couldn't do a shoot with her because of the blasted exam. If not I would've probably even done it for free in exchange to use her pictures for my new compcards.

On the topic of Cho Seung-Hui and the shooting at Virginia Tech Uni, I have something to say...

After the incident made headlines on today's newpapers once again, a few of my friends, classmates, schoolmates etc texted/MSN me about some parellels they drew between the killer and a friend of ours.

1) He stalks girls, even though he would vehemently deny it, most girls complain about being stalked/harrassed by him
2) He blames the whole world for everything that goes wrong with in his life.
[ie. Me against the "_____"]
3) He thinks he's holier than thou
4) He cannot see past superficial reasons for others' popularity
5) He is a loner
6) He is a loser


The only difference is we do not know whether he has been admitted to a mental hospital, and whether or not he has guns.


Oh btw, I used the word 'friend' because the newspaper mentioned that Cho was a loner and had no friends. Hence to avoid such tragedy from happening, I shall hereby create an illusion that he does have friends.

PS: Hong Myong Bo, you dont have to pretend to be a Korean to make reference to another Korean, yar? I have your IP address, and it looks very familiar...ermm why har?