Phuket: The land of excess

An excesss of masseuse, nail parlours, tailors and Italian Restaurants.
Day after day, from the beach side to the secluded soi to a makeshift push cart.
No differentiation, no diversification.
It's an excess of the same things.


Too many saggy white whales populating the beaches,
Frolicking in the sun with their young Asian wives.
The image is somewhat disturbing, so ermm
'nuff said.

Too much unfulfilled promises of the beautiful underwater world,

and pristine white beaches nestled against the Andaman Sea.

The stark seabed and piles of dead corals destroyed by the Tsunami

That bore no vestiges of its glorious past as a paradise on earth.

Too many dark skinned girls or "girls" in miniskirts gyrating clumsily in Go-Go Bars

Luring the lone White traveller with alcohol and their not-so-nubile body

"But look, we are Oriental and exotic.

We can show you our tits and we love you big big."

It doesn't matter if you have a big belly, or if you look so old that the excitement from a blowjob will kill you.

It's okay as long as you are White and have the money.

A beach resort that is an excess of a beach resort.

Everything is built to look like a resort, and everywhere sells bikinis and sun block.

But it is a place where you get overwhelmed by the theatrics of its excessiveness,

And you forget, and you really do,

With the heat from the sun, the tranquility from the sea and the loud music;

With the pain from a sun burn and the distraction from too many hot bodies.

You momentarily forget...

(even whales forget that they are still whales)

How to politely refuse a Tuk Tuk ride in Phuket

During one of those long random walks along Kata Beach in Phuket, I fell in love with a T-shirt that says:

"I f*cking do not want a Thai massage,

tailor a suit

or ride a Tuk tuk,

so leave me alone!"

I bought it but regreted doing so also immediately because I don't think I'll ever have the guts to wear it.

Birthdays to me

At 5,
It meant going to school with blackforrest birthday cakes and pretty hair ribbons.
It meant I was the envy of all the boys and girls in kindergarten, with gifts of pink lollipops, and apple flavoured gummies.
It meant excitement.

At 8,

It meant Daddy coming home early with a birthday cake and McDonald's nuggets.

It meant wishing upon the candle wick that I'll grow up to be pretty and smart.

It meant simple, uncomplicated joy.

At 10,
Birthdays meant lots of friends, slumber parties and sweet valley kids books.
It meant going for water-rides in Sentosa, eating popcorns and hotdogs.
It meant fun.

At 12,
It meant having a new little brother who commanded everyone's attention.
It meant tolerating your Mother's post-natal depression - yelling, crying and bearing the brunt for everything that went wrong in the house.
It meant responsibilities.

At 15,
It meant being asked out on a date, with a single stalk of rose and earrings from Perlini's Silver.
It meant trying to look nonchalent when he tried to hold your sweaty palms to cross the road.
It meant a whole night of insomnia, feeling dizzy with the thought of having a boyfriend.
It meant the taste of first-love.

At 18,
It meant that Daddy couldn't come home and nobody remembered.
It meant putting on a brave front despite all the screaming, anger, and flying objects.
It meant nursing a boyfriend problem.
It meant hours of crying under the table, and blowing out a single candle by myself.
It meant sadness.

At 20,
It meant going moving away from home to live on campus, without your parents.
It meant making new friends, clubbing and drinking for the first time.
It meant cussing like a sailor.
It meant a new found sexuality.
It meant freedom.

At 22,
It meant being in-love, and being loved.
It meant a familiar scent, your favourite wine, and a quiet celebration with the family eating crabs at Toa Payoh.
It meant contentment.

At 24,
It meant working in front of your computer.
It meant numbing yourself with episodes of transient happiness.
It meant crying your eyes out because you feel all sucky and you don't really know what you want to do with your life and you have nobody to speak to.
It meant loneliness.

"What Girls Think" of Amara Sanctuary Resort

Catch me in my bimbo moments with SauceInk's series of "What Girls Think?" - as we tour Singapore to bring you the very best (and candid/unrehearsed) review.

For our debut, we visited the Amara Sanctuary Resort.

On a separate occassion, I had the good fortune of visiting their two-bedroom villa (image) below: Featuring an outdoor bathroom, and 2 rooms adjourned by a pool. Being a sucker for outdoor bathrooms and idyllic living, I thought the place was so beautiful, that I think I teared a little when I left for the day.


Nestled on the hillside of Sentosa's Palawan Beach offering its guests great seclusion, the Amara Sanctuary resort bears vestiges of Singapore's rich colonial past. Tastefully blending old-fashion romance with chic modernity, it's hard not to fall in love with the place.

Although it's not my maiden visit here, this was the first time that I was given a VIP tour of the place, and here're the highlights that makes the place oh-so-worth your buck.

Upon arrival, we were hosted at Shutters, a casual fusion restaurant with an open-concept kitchen. Amara Sanctuary doesn't only have 1, but 5 dining areas, including the ever-famous ThanYing Thai Restaurant, which (unfortunately) we didn't go to :(





The Infinity Pool
The sky Infinity Pool on the rooftop overlooks the South China Sea and it seems to stretch endlessly over the edge, and here's the best part. The inifinity pool area bans children from entering - That sounds like paradise to me


The courtyard suite
You would never believe it, but the 2-storey colonial-style Courtyard Suites were created from former British Sergeants’ quarters from the 1930s. It features an outdoor courtyard with a sunbed (that I am sitting on), a sumptuous four-poster bed with super high-thread count bedsheets (gasp!) , and a Jacuzzi in its own private garden.


The Jacuzzi in private garden was a winner for most of the girls.

Enough of my boring ramble...catch me on sauceINK's "What Girls Think".




*An early bird who caught the preview texted me the following,
U r so not you in the "What Girls Think" video! Ha...I can see you are struggling to keep the real you from surfacing! :-D

What can I say, except that even bimbos have their shy moments lah.

Bring my sexy back

After eons of not blogging, I'm back with a scary picture of my back.

My sedentary lifestyle of hunching over the computer, and alternative lifestyle of partying till the wee hours of the morning has taken a toll on my health, with frequent shoulder aches and insomnia. While the rest of my friends sought expensive spa treatments from Banyan Tree, I paid a visit to a Chinese sinseh at a TCM clinic in Rocher to get thrashed up.

For about S$80 and 2.5 hours, you get the following done to you:

• Ba Mai: Get a calibration of your body's nerves, channels and vital points to determine your type of "illness"
• Shua: Scrub Therapy
• Gua Sha: Scrapping Therapy to improve ciculation and to remove the toxic heat and "qi" in your body (This is VERY motherfucking painful)
• Zou Guan & Ba Guan: Cupping Therapy to release the stagnant "chi" in the body
• Pressed, Prodded, Slapped, Pinched and Kneaded

While I was glad to come out in one-piece with a general sense of relaxation, the Ba Guan and Gua Sha gave me HUGE FUGLY purple welts and splotches as seen from the picture. Guess I won't be going to the beach or be seen painitng the town red in skimpy outfits for a while till the marks go away.

Isabelle the weekend Rocker

When I am not out partying up a storm and guzzling peanut butter jello vodka shots at Butter Factory, this is really what I do during the weekend.



I am using their video because I'm too embarrassed to show my own video. But my title sure caught your attention didn't it.

The Best Press Release Ever

Anyone who has ever drafted a press release would know that it typically follows a standard format that addresses the 5Ws and 1H in the immediate paragraph after the title.

So imagine my shock when I received a call to draft an URGENT announcement, that if translated into a press release would potentially read like this:

Singapore. July XX, 2009 - XXX Company announces today that they are intending to buy some properties. They can't tell you where and what, but they can tell you that they are buying something. They can't tell you why they are doing this, but they can tell you that there are many implications. We don't really know when we can tell you the information, but we thought it's a good idea to do PR around this decision.

Their corp comms ought to be shot.

(Names and content of the conversation has been tweaked severly for P&C reasons)